The Rule of Life: Finding Freedom in Loving Union with God

Let's dive deep into something that might sound rigid at first but is actually one of the most freeing and life-giving practices you could ever embrace: a Rule of Life. This is not just about schedules or routines—it’s about living intentionally, aligning your everyday life with God’s purpose for you, and walking in loving union with Him.

Both Peter Scazzero in The Emotionally Healthy Leader and John Mark Comer in Practicing the Way have incredible insights into this ancient, yet completely relevant practice. They both challenge us to slow down, create rhythms that nourish our souls, and structure our lives in a way that keeps us connected to God.

What Is a Rule of Life?

A Rule of Life is essentially a framework for how you live your life. It’s a set of intentional practices and commitments that guide your relationship with God, others, and yourself. Peter Scazzero describes it as a trellis, something that supports and helps you grow spiritually. Without it, our lives can spiral into busyness, distraction, and disconnection from God.

John Mark Comer takes it further by reminding us that a Rule of Life is not about following strict rules or checking off boxes. It’s about practicing the way of Jesus, creating space for rest, work, worship, and relationships in a way that reflects the life Jesus modeled for us.

Loving Union: The Heart of the Rule

At the core of a Rule of Life is loving union with God. This is what transforms it from a rigid set of rules into something freeing and joyful. When we align our daily practices—whether it's prayer, scripture reading, rest, or work—with our desire to be in relationship with God, everything else begins to fall into place.

Jesus speaks to this in John 15:4-5: “Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.” A Rule of Life helps us abide in Jesus, structuring our lives around practices that keep us rooted in His love and presence.

How to Create Your Rule of Life

Here’s the beautiful part: your Rule of Life doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. It’s unique to you and your journey with God. But if you’re wondering where to start, here are a few suggestions:

1. Start with your non-negotiables: What are the spiritual disciplines, relationships, or health practices you know you need to thrive? This might be daily prayer, scripture reading, or Sabbath rest.

2. Consider your season of life: What do you need right now? Your Rule of Life will shift and adapt as life changes. Be flexible, but keep your core commitments strong.

3. Balance work, rest, and play: Comer reminds us that a healthy Rule of Life includes time for joy and fun, not just work or spiritual disciplines. If you work with your mind, rest with your hands—and vice versa. Find activities that bring you delight and refreshment.

4. Integrate your values and relationships: Your Rule of Life isn’t just about your spiritual life—it’s about all of you. How can you create rhythms that honor your family, your physical health, and your emotional well-being?

The Freedom in a Rule of Life

Now, if the idea of a Rule of Life feels overwhelming, let me remind you: this is meant to free you, not burden you. When we create intentional rhythms, we actually create more space for spontaneity, joy, and connection with God.

John Mark Comer puts it beautifully: “Hurry is the great enemy of spiritual life.” We live in a world that glorifies busyness, but Jesus calls us to a different way—a way of rest, reflection, and being fully present with Him. A Rule of Life is a practical tool that helps us resist the pull of hurry and step into the rhythm of grace God has designed for us.

A Rule of Life in Action

Personally, I’ve found immense freedom in practicing my Rule of Life. As a wife, mother, and leader, I need intentional practices to keep me grounded. My Rule of Life starts with morning prayer and scripture, builds in time for work and play, and includes Sabbath rest at the end of each week. It’s not perfect, and it’s always evolving, but it’s a lifeline for staying connected to God in the midst of everyday life.

As you consider creating your own Rule of Life, remember that it’s not about perfection. It’s about practicing loving union with God, aligning your life with His heart for you, and finding freedom in the rhythms of grace.

Let’s commit to this together! Let’s slow down, embrace the Rule of Life, and walk in the abundant life Jesus promised us.